Perhaps you are new to divorce and aren’t sure how you might be expected to get through the holidays. There are all kinds of different family scenarios that can play out. In general, the length of time you were in a relationship with your now ex-spouse has plenty to do with how badly these holiday times can play out for you. If there are children in the mix, it makes for an even greater potential heartbreak.
There’s a good chance you exhausted all your money on lawyers and got a less than desirable result. There is a playbook that lawyers typically employ on the husband in a divorce with children. It starts by insinuating a scenario that there is domestic violence. This allows for a protection order to be granted. This is a pretty good holiday wrecker in and of itself, particularly if you end up receiving supervised visitation. Protection orders can include very strict no contact provisions where you are unable to communicate with your children. Such restrictions may also stipulate against using a third party such as a friend to help get messages through. It’s not good but you will need to handle things through your lawyer who, in their capacity as an officer of the court has more power in this situation than you do. You are going to need to maintain your business relationships and earn as much money as you can to keep your legal representatives retained. While there are organizations that offer support and reduced price legal help, they are not everywhere and unfortunately you are now in a situation you will be dealing with legally for the rest of your life.
Separation from what you may had considered to be a lifetime of future holiday celebrations is gut wrenching. It’s easy to drown your sorrows in vices like drinking and worse but you should absolutely avoid such temptations. The reality of the matter is you have to try even harder than ever to get yourself back on track. The world has shifted about you and now you need to re-adjust your footing. You are now presented with an opportunity. You can reshape, remold your entire life and this time, you are going to do everything you can to bullet proof yourself against any missteps.
REMEMBERING LIFE BEFORE YOU WERE MARRIED
After all, you already had family values taught to you from your own childhood. There is no reason to abandon them. If, due to a divorce, you are disassociated from your family during the holidays, there are still positive measures you can take to edify the spirit of those holidays. A time honored way to celebrate holidays is with greeting cards. There is no reason you can’t find or create a nice greeting card and share it with your friends and loved one’s. It is a fairly inexpensive way to help reinforce your relationships. When there are protection orders in place, you will need to have your attorney advise you and possibly forward your communications through the proper channels.
STEPPING INTO THE FUTURE
Blogging is a popular new way to make your thoughts known. You may not be able to spend the holidays directly with your now ex family but you can write about your thoughts and provide them with well wishes online in a place they can access. This includes the possibility of v-blogs or video messages you can record and upload. Providing the Internet doesn’t collapse, these messages can serve to preserve your well wishes each and every holiday, birthday and other ceremonial dates for years to come!