Without fear of contradiction, I would openly say that divorce is painful, it does not matter whether it was necessary or not. It does not matter which one wanted it; it affects both parties. If not well taken care of, people have committed suicide due to the same. After my divorce, things got hard for me, but I am glad I took a few steps that brought me back to my feet. These are steps I would gladly recommend to anyone who is undergoing divorce despite people’s circumstances being different.
Sharing my story
I must admit that the first few times I told my story, it sounded to me like it was someone else’s and not mine. I was still in a state of shock and disbelief. But the more I told it, the more I accepted it, and the more I realized that I was not alone in this, as many times I met people who had gone through the same. What I had initially feared would turn into a gossip session, turned into a healing session. Some people would advise me against doing so, because I was giving my ex more power over me, but eventually I realized that the more I shared, the more I gained strength to go on with life.
I was against this at first, but I gave it a try and it worked well for me. I found an online help group for people who were undergoing divorce. Being with such people gave me confidence and strength to move on. Hearing and reading the testimonies of others helped me know that there are some who have battled this course and came out alive. I got a place I could share my feelings; I could vent about what happened, but at the end, I could get advice as well.
Family and friends
Most people tend to close themselves away from family and friends during hard times, but in times like these, I have learned to be vulnerable to the people that love me. Of course, not all will be there for me, but in most cases, I have had someone to lean on when I needed one during the desperate moments.
Before inviting friends and family, I locked myself in my house for days crying my eyes out. But I am grateful for the fact that one day I picked up the phone and called a few people who turned out to be very supportive.